Le Reveur ~ The Dreamer

There comes a time in a women’s life when priorities shift and an imaginary switch goes off in your brain. It’s like you wake up one day and you wonder where did all the time go? Is there still enough time to do everything you wanted? You know, simple things like get married, have children, watch your babies grow up and experience the trials and tribulations of life. Trying your hardest to keep them safe and protected but not sheltered.

But for whatever reason there is no marriage. No babies to love. No house with a family to come home to. And while you recognize the grass is not always greener on the other side, you also realize how nice it would be to step on that grass…if only for a moment.

You know at some point you start to reflect and wonder how’d I get here? How did my life choices take me to where I am today? You try desperately not to get pregnant in your 20’s, and in your 30’s you are more open to it but still focusing on your career all the while, contemplating the possibility of marriage and family. But it just doesn’t pan out that way, at least not for you. Now well into your 40’s and still no marriage, no kids and ALL your friend’s kids are teenagers and in some instances, they are grown, married and considering starting a family of their own. So, you sit back and ask yourself…How did I get here?

Surely there were some great guys in your life. You were even proposed to but not by the right person. So, it all comes back to choices and priorities. Never wanting to be a single mother or a desperate woman rushing into something because you yearned for a baby (not that there is anything wrong with either of those decisions, just not what you wanted for yourself.)

You just think …. you’ll always have the option to have a family. BUT then things change. Your body starts to do weird things. And you realize the hope is no more. It’s not that you don’t want it, it may be that you just can’t at this stage in the game. Who wants to be the mother that is constantly confused as the grandmother?  But also, your selection of men is just NOT what it used to be. Many are married and well that’s just taboo, some have no desire to be in a serious relationship, while others just don’t meet your standards.

Sure, it would have been easy to just get pregnant, but what if you made calculated choices not to have kids with just anyone and what you really wanted was to have that family unit ~ consisting of father, mother, kids all in one household. Is that so wrong?

So, you continue to reflect and ask yourself more questions. Did I party too much in my 20’s? Focus too much on my career in my 30’s? Now in your late 40’s ~ wanting nothing more than a family. You think there will ALWAYS be time for that…but really? Is there? One day you wake up and POOF it’s a little late.

But life is a journey. Remain faithful and all that is meant for you will be for you!

“Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13:7

Always remember ~ “Family is everything!”

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Author: Carrie L. Devone

Living & Learning...

18 thoughts on “Le Reveur ~ The Dreamer”

  1. Great observations Carrie. This is me. Yet I’m grateful that God has filled my life with lots of love from family and friends and with the opportunity to experience wonderful adventures at home and around the world.

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  2. Beautifully written Carrie! Being able to look yourself in the mirror and be happy with who you are and feeling blessed about the journey life has given you is…PRICELESS! I believe in life there are no regrets and eeveryone’s journey is different. Being happy with you are as a person is the key. I love reading all of your articles. Keep up the good work!!

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  3. Wow! What a thought provoking post. You are right, family is everything! What I’ve come to realize though is that a Family can look a lot of different ways. Family is loving, caring about/for, wanting the very best that there is for someone other than yourself. Whatever your family looks like, embrace and love them unconditionally!
    Thanks Carrie for the good read! I love your perspective:)

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  4. Great read Carrie. Though I will never fully understand what women go through, reading this still hits home for someone I love and care for is this woman or at least most of the points you touched on. All in all great article!!

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  5. Good read! Men also go through the same type of “reality check” at some point and time in their lives. It makes a person take a closer look at the choices that he/she has made thru the years, and specifically the impact those choices have made in their and/or their loved ones lives. Sometimes, we all fall short of our self imposed expectations or society’s expectations for us.

    Learn…Adjust…Live!

    Keep Writing!!

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    1. Fred,
      Yes, I can imagine men experience a similar gut check at some point in their lives. Life is interesting and as we continue to live the goal is to continue to grow, learn & expand. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment!

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  6. Carrie, this was so beautifully well written!! I was beginning to feel this same way and at the age of 39 my husband and I are having our first baby. God is so loving, and will never leave us in despair. Your words are so true, Remain faithful. Thank you for sharing!!

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  7. So well said, Carrie! We all go through stages of our lives, ask ourselves what happened or what should’ve happened.. Then we turn our heads towards the future and hope for more. It takes strength to voice all of this! Beautiful!

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